Pokémon Detective Pikachu (2019) Review

In 2005, when “Batman Begins” was released; the consensus was the film was a much-needed shot in the arm to not only its franchise; but to the genre it was a part of after the disappointing reception to years of lackluster comic book superhero films and the previous installments killed the franchise for years. Looking back, its influence is clear; but the film is definitely a textbook example of how to do a realistic adaptation of an outlandish premise right: it captured what made the original story work and made a movie that worked on its own merit even to people who normally aren’t fans of the source material.

This film ended up having something similar done, even though many of the same questions were raised: Focusing on a little-known spinoff video game rather than the main RPGs or the TV show? Casting lesser-known actors as leads and making the story a “neo-noir” film instead of a straight-up effect-driven sci-fi/fantasy tentpole? Giving a budget of $150 million to a director and crew not known for making movies of this scale? Doing all of this to adapt a medium and IP often dismissed as being little more than forgettable kiddie fare? Yet, by some miracle; the filmmakers managed to pull it off and make a movie that respects its lineage while also being a good movie on its own merit. Given the rocky track record both video game and anime adaptations have had (Super Mario Bros., anyone? How about Dragonball Evolution?), what I’m about tell you is proof that it can be done. I will also give you one warning about spoilers for both this movie and the Nintendo 3DS game on which it’s based; so with that out of the way, let’s open up my full review of the summer’s hit blockbuster movie: 2019's “Pokémon Detective Pikachu!”

We open on PCL Labs, in the mountains outside Ryme City. The facility contains Mewtwo, and right off; this movie lets you know exactly what you’re in for the moment you get to the theater, or press the play button. Not counting DTV movies or Fathom Events releases of the newer anime films, this is the first entry in the franchise to be rated PG; the first to get a wide theatrical release in 18 years, and the first live-action adaptation of any Nintendo game in 26 years!

"Starring a CGI character, a British Villain, a Gratuitous Cameo, Directed by an Overpaid Tool."

There’s some sparks, the lab goes into a red alert like the Enterprise because of a power loss; and Mewtwo says, “They’re outside” as a car tries to flee the scene! What follows is admittedly a pretty freaky rampage: as Mewtwo escapes from the lab in a similar manner to the first movie, the film establishes a darker tone right off as the researchers are killed and the car crashes off an overpass in a fairly realistic manner. 

We then transition to a field in the countryside, and are introduced to Tim Goodman (Justice Smith) and his friend Jack (Karan Soni). Right away, the Pokémon in the movie definitely show that the film has made the visuals work in a real-world context. On top the Mewtwo rampage, the film uses 54 of the 809 (and counting!) Pokémon in some creative setups that put a unique spin on the long-running series while not forgetting what made it work to begin with. Anyway, Jack has brought Tim out to catch a Cubone; and while Tim is reluctant, he still decides to give it a go anyway. Before I continue, I will also note that the Poké Ball prop in this scene is actually a cell phone powerbank in that shape; with the LED lights on the button being replaced with one LED running down the stripe of the ball.

"It's Christmas sunshine, and I'm after someone on my Naughty List."

Tim takes the ball and starts talking to Cubone, and the way he mentions Cubone’s skull mask also foreshadows Tim’s own background. He throws the ball, and while it at first seems he’s caught Cubone; the ball not only pops back open, but Cubone throws its bone at Tim so hard that it doesn’t just knock him down, there’s actually a small explosion! After that, we find out that Tim is apparently an insurance salesman who just turned 21 years old; making him both older and already more expanded than in the game, where he’s 17 and essentially a cipher that players can apply traits to. Also, the game is basically a point-and-click adventure like the ones I used to play on PC: Maniac Mansion, Day of the Tentacle and my personal favorite; Full Throttle. The movie takes a different direction, but one that still fits. He then gets a signal on his phone, which he admits finally happened. Probably using Boost Mobile or something. He checks his voicemail, and finds out his something happened to his father Harry. 

Getting on the train from Leaventown (see what they did there?), he heads to Ryme City; and is greeted by a Lickitung licking him. He just takes this in stride as he dries himself off, and this is another moment that establishes the tone of the movie and how the Pokémon are used: rather than try to shy away from the absurdity, they embraced it while also making it work in the context of our world. A video then plays on the monitors of the train, which introduces Howard Clifford (Bill Nighy), a character unique to the movie who helped build Ryme City. There’s also a cameo from a Pokémon Trainer in a familiar looking outfit (Ryoma Takeuchi, “Kamen Rider Drive”). 

Despite having a degenerative illness that’s left him wheelchair-bound; his wealth and skills not only created a vast array of business deals, but also made Ryme City a place where people and Pokémon coexist peacefully rather than train, battle and rest in Poké Balls. I also kind of like how some of the footage in this video is made to look like it’s from the 1990s; with his hairstyle, the relative video quality and aspect ratio being made to match. 

Tim steps off the train in Tahnti Station, which is the London Underground being reworked with special effects to portray Ryme City. This shot of Tim walking to the Ryme City Police Department is a great example of the approach the filmmakers took to portray the Pokémon World: though CGI has reached a point where they can believably work on film, the movie actually was shot on 35mm film and mainly on location (London for the majority, with some scenes in Scotland and Colorado) and practical sets rather than relying on digital cameras and chroma key. This is similar to how films like Mad Max: Fury Road and these new Star Wars movies have been made, which I appreciate. On top of this, by downplaying reliance on battles; greater emphasis is placed on making the setting seem like a developed world rather than just another cliché “live-action cartoon” aesthetic countless other adaptations have done. So, seeing people accept a Snorlax sleeping on the road and Machamp acting as a crossing guard fits this world perfectly.

Entering RCPD HQ, Tim meets with Lt. Hide Yoshida (Ken Watanabe) about his father’s disappearance and apparent death. Yoshida also has a Snubbull, and I guess this was a natural progression for Watanabe among genre films: he’s helped train Batman, researched Godzilla and was a samurai Transformer that fit in a sports car; among other roles. On that note, he’s a composite of Detective Baker and Inspector Holiday from the game; filling the same role as Harry’s former colleague and Tim’s mentor/surrogate father in Ryme City. After the two talk about Harry and Tim being a former Pokémon Trainer, Yoshida gives him the key to Harry’s apartment. I definitely like this shot of Tim heading to the apartment building, and it’s full of great little details like a Joltik scurrying on a vent and a group of Aipom climbing on the sign to the apartment building (more on that in a moment). The movie is already establishing itself as a sort of blend of films like “Blade Runner” and “Who Framed Roger Rabbit,” and the title character still hasn’t appeared yet!

In the apartment building, Tim encounters a Psyduck while checking his father’s mail; and its partner; CNM intern Lucy Stevens (Kathryn Newton)! Oh boy, it’s the noir trifecta! The lead is new in town, his parents are dead; and the love interest just happens to be an intrepid reporter! On top of being like our April O’Neil, Lois Lane or Vicki Vale for this movie; she seems to be a composite of Emilia and Meiko from the game: combining the former’s spunk with the latter’s investigative reporting skills. Despite being relegated to writing online fluff pieces (I can relate), she definitely is a great help to Tim as the movie goes on. That’s also a nice outfit Tim is wearing: it would be a shame if something happened to it.

Tim goes into his father’s apartment, and shuts off the TV; which is playing the film within a film from “Home Alone,” “Angels with Filthy Souls.” “Keep the change, ya filthy animal!” I will also deal with the potential reboot as it comes, as well as a reversion as an offbeat adult comedy. 

We then get some flashbacks to when Tim was younger that expand on his past: He’s not only estranged from his father, but in a notable difference from the game; his mother apparently died of an unspecified illness when he was a child. Both of these caused him to turn his back on being a Pokémon Trainer; and he’s been living with his grandmother (Josette Simon) ever since. In the game, Tim’s mother isn’t seen; but is stated to be alive and well by his dialogues, providing moral support as he searches for his father Harry in Ryme City.

Searching through his father’s belongings, Tim finds a sample of R amid his case files; and ends up unwittingly poisoning the Aipom with it as he opens the window to air the place out after almost getting a whiff of it. While this is the only form of R from the game in the movie, it has the same effect of bringing out the more aggressive traits of a Pokémon and enhancing their powers. 

Tim then notices some rattling in the kitchen, and picks up a stapler to investigate the source. The tone of this movie is now firmly established at this point: at just about 20 minutes in, we’re introduced to the titular Detective Pikachu (voice of Ryan Reynolds)!

Oh Hello there!

As Tim is a bit uneasy at the fact there’s a Pikachu that can talk like a person, I must give some major props to the VFX artists: rather than turning Goombas into knockoff Stormtroopers, they nailed what worked about the original designs while also giving us something that can work on film. Definitely beats a bunch of juiced-up Ninja Turtles or Transformers that look like they came out of a junk pile.

While in the game, the worst thing the Aipom did was steal a piece of jewelry from someone; the Aipom here all attack Tim and Detective Pikachu like a group of crazed, purple-eyed zombies! One of them leaps on Tim’s head and others start climbing on his body, causing Detective Pikachu to look for something to throw at them! Maybe the cream cheese spreader could work. The two are chased on the roof, with Tim being briefly pulled out of his shoes; dress shirt and pants, almost saying "oh shit" before it’s cut off by the crazed Aipom and they escape through the garbage chute! The way Smith is exclaiming as it happens kind of reminds me of Cleveland and the bathtub.

Running into an adjacent alley, while this bit of Tim running around half-dressed is clearly for younger viewers; I’m honestly more amused at the fact that nobody seems to react to Tim yelling about what’s happening. They only really address Tim when he calls attention to Detective Pikachu, and the latter lampshades this as Tim reclaims his pants from the Aipom: “I figured you’d be more of a briefs guy, I don’t really wear underwear; I’m not modest.”

"This guy has the right idea : He wore the brown pants!"

Said alley also has a Charmander and an Octillery grilling at a hibachi, and on top of Tim being the only one who can understand Detective Pikachu (everyone else hears the voice of the anime VA, Ikue Ohtani); he warns Tim that people might get suspicious about him mentioning “the stuff he put up his nose.”  R: it's a Hell of a drug.

Noticing Harry’s name and address written in the tag of Pikachu’s hunting cap, the two regroup over coffee at the nearby Hi-Hat Café, a location from the game I’m pleased made it in.

I also like the little touches of Detective Pikachu’s love of coffee; and the inclusion of Pablo (Alejandro de Mesa in a bit part) and Ludicolo acting as a barista. 

There’s also a brief cameo from Jigglypuff (voice of an uncredited Rachael Lillis), and I also like this part of the Purrloin and its partner; reminds me of the part with Gaff in the noodle shop in Blade Runner.

So, there’s the story: while it does take come creative liberties with the game, the basic plot thankfully remains the same: Tim is a young man who has come to Ryme City to search for his father Harry; who went missing, presumed dead two months prior to the film’s events. Teaming up with Detective Pikachu, the two form an unlikely bond to figure out the truth about what happened and uncover a greater mystery that could threaten the entire Pokémon World. I actually am glad they started with this one first, since it’s logistically easier than trying to condense over 20 years of video game lore and over 1,000 episodes of TV into one 104-minute movie. 

Back at the apartment, Tim and Detective Pikachu get cleaned up and try to determine their next move. I also like how actual character posters and TCG cards are used as props in Tim’s childhood bedroom. He tries to claim they were set up for visits by Harry, but Detective Pikachu naturally isn’t fooled. 

The next day, after Tim puts on an outfit that his father left for him (including an Unown shirt that I have the official replica of); he and Detective Pikachu try to determine what happened with the R and Harry’s investigation. Before the two leave to start asking around for Harry’s informant; the movie even spoofs the cliché of the “Wall of craziness” made of potential clues. Reminds me of trying to find Pepé Silvia.

After Detective Pikachu describes the situation as “caliente fiesta,” he and Tim decide to go “press” Lucy for what she knows at CNM. Um, phrasing?

At CNM, a news broadcast announcing the Pokémon Carnival is underway with Howard Clifford and his son Roger (Chris Geere); with an instrumental of the Pokémon Theme playing in the BGM. While their working relationship isn’t too bad, their relationship as father and son is strained. Roger sees his father’s work with Pokémon to help his condition as overly frivolous, Howard is just as put off by his son’s cynicism. It kind of reminds me of the relationship between Norman and Harry Osborne in most versions of Spider-Man. 

On that note, while Geere somewhat resembles Roger’s appearance in the game; his character is much more condescending, inheriting some traits from rival detective Brad. I can at least tell that Geere is enjoying himself: I never watched that show he was on, but he’s making a meal of the scenery as a sort of parody of these pompous TV personae. Case in point: when Lucy comes over with a tip about the incident at PCL Labs, Roger dismisses the idea; telling her to find a source and commenting that “it isn’t news if it can’t be verified.” That’s more commentary on journalism ethics than I expected from this movie, to be honest. Again, I can relate.

Tim then meets with Lucy about the information, and while it’s not exactly the same way it played out in the game; the TV station fulfills a similar role in providing vital information about the case. In some ways, it kind of reminds me of the dynamic in Venom: young investigators good, older corrupt corporate executive bad. Lucy presents Tim with more samples of R, and tells him that Harry’s informant is at the docks; warning him that “they’re pretty dangerous at night.” Tim replies that he’s “pretty good at being alone at night.” Hey! Phrasing!

Detective Pikachu also lampshades how awkward that sounded, and I gotta say; I’m surprised at how naturally the cast plays off each other. Not only do the human actors fit surprisingly well for the setting and tone, the way the Pokémon occupy Ryme City is seamless. This is vitally important when they’re the emotional center of your story, least of all; the title character. On that note, he and Tim head to the docks; and discover that Mr. Mime is Harry’s informant, crashing as he tries to get away on an invisible bicycle. “Mr. Mime! This isn’t the time to use that!”

This scene is notable for several reasons: not only is Mr. Mime much more savage without saying a single word than in previous versions (such as the main games or “Mimey” from the anime), but its tone was influenced by; of all films, David Fincher’s thriller “Se7en.” Moreover, while the studio wanted this scene cut initially; director Rob Letterman was able to convince Tsunekazu Ishihara himself (president of The Pokémon Company and a key figure to the series since the beginning) to keep it in. Sure enough, it’s one of the most memorable parts of the movie. Tim actually starts pantomiming matches and gasoline to try and find out where the R is being moved; and I am very impressed with how expressive he and all the other Pokémon are in this movie.

"I'm about to do to you what Limp Bizkit did to music in the late '90s!"

Eventually, Mr. Mime does get spooked enough by his interrogation to reveal where one of the shipments of R was sent; and Detective Pikachu also lampshades that the location is “not from the games.” Even with the track record live-action video game and anime adaptations have had; I’m ok with changing things if the changes make sense for the different medium. I’ve beaten the game at least twice (planning a third playthrough before the sequel on Nintendo Switch), and I’ve taken many hours depending on how much I want to spend finding all the secrets and unique cutscenes.

The location is an underground battle arena known as “the Roundhouse.” How does this club introduce you to its approach to Pokémon battling in the seedy underbelly of Ryme City? Two words: beatboxing Loudred. 

I mean, when I heard this movie was going to render its Pokémon in realistic CGI; I was expecting something like how they look in “Super Smash Bros.” or “Pokkén Tournament,” but they went all out with it. There’s also a small appearance from Diplo as a DJ/fight MC. I don’t listen to him, but I imagine this will be remembered in 20 years the same way the campy OST from the first movie is now. Their investigation draws the attention of the arena’s head, Sebastian (Omar Chaparro); who has had a run in with Detective Pikachu before, along with his Charizard.

"Nice to see you, Jared! I'll take a footlong: fully loaded."

The investigation also draws the attention of a mysterious woman with pink hair named Ms. Norman (Suki Waterhouse in a non-speaking role). Sebastian shows how the last time Detective Pikachu was there, the encounter damaged his coat and scarred his Charizard! While some people were put off by how Charizard was rendered in this movie; it’s actually not that different from how other live-action fantasy works like Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings have rendered their dragons and other creatures. Personally, I think it actually looks pretty badass.

Now, comes what’s probably my favorite part of this movie: the Roundhouse fight. Sebastian says that he will tell Tim what he knows about the R and what happened to Harry on the condition that Pikachu wins a rematch with his Charizard. He grudgingly agrees, and Detective Pikachu hands Tim his hat for safekeeping. “Big CGI fight coming up!” 

Courtesy: IGN

As the doors to the ring are locked, Sebastian doses his Charizard with a year’s worth of R; as Pikachu realizes this won’t be as easy as before! While Tim does give recommendations from his move pool, Pikachu replies that due to his accident with Harry; not only does he not remember his past, he doesn’t remember his attacks either! This is similar to how it was in the game, but the movie plays with it in ways that honestly made it one of the most fun experiences I’ve had in the theater this year. As Pikachu realizes the danger at hand, he shouts at Tim, and I quote: “GET ME THE HELL OUT OF HERE!” … Guess that’s expected when you cast the same guy as Deadpool in the title role. I actually don’t mind it within reason, and it kind of reminds me of the 1986 Transformers movie and the 1990 TMNT movie in that context.

What follows is actually a creative way of handling Pokémon battles in live-action: the way both Pikachu and Tim rely on both their wit and their other skills to win actually does a good job of putting its own spin on both the 3DS game and the series as a whole. The way the fight is staged is like a mix of the Rancor scene in Return of the Jedi; the Bonesaw fight in the first Spider-Man and the Hulk VS Thor fight in Thor Ragnarok.

I must also compliment the crew that everyone put together to help make this movie: the production designer Nigel Phelps (“Wizarding World of Harry Potter”), award-nominated cinematographer John Mathieson (“Logan”, “Gladiator”) and the two editors of James Thomas and Mark Sanger. With these and other crew members’ credentials, that alone tells me they weren’t just looking for who they could get: they were looking for someone who they knew was good to get this on the screen. The music by Henry Jackman (whose credits include both “Wreck-it Ralph” films, both “Kingsman” films and the second and third “Captain America” movies) also does a great job at blending the series’ sounds of orchestral music, electronic music and driving rock. Case in point: when Tim starts trying to stomp out the flame on Charizard’s tail; the beatboxing Loudred I mentioned before start going nuts when the other vials of R in Sebastian’s coat are broken and Sebastian starts yelling like a screaming banshee! Again, I’m not familiar with Omar Chaparro; but he must have known full well what kind of movie he signed up for when he did that.

As the arena starts turning even more into a madhouse than before, Tim; as the victor, is able to get the location of the R’s source: a doctor at PCL Labs will know more, but there’s still the matter of the rampaging Charizard juiced up on R! The noise from the Loudred and all the other Pokémon rampaging broke an aquarium with a Magikarp, which is able to evolve into a Gyarados through sheer will! I am very impressed with how expressive the CGI Pokémon are in this movie. The moment Charizard starts sobering up from the R is also the exact moment it knows it’s lost the battle; as if to say, “Oh man: this is gonna hurt!”

After a misunderstanding with the RCPD, Yoshida shows Tim the security footage of the crash before Harry disappeared. He also tries to talk Tim through his grief, but Tim will have none of it. After that; Tim realizes that in order to really get closure on what happened to Harry, he and Detective Pikachu need each other. Even in moments of this movie where I’m not laughing (which are rare), I’m invested in other ways of how they made this story work. As the two vow to solve this mystery; I am impressed at how much emotional weight they’ve given to an electric mouse and a supporting cast member from Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom.

Then, the two are accosted by Ms. Norman; whose black SUV is immediately referred to as a “Bad Guy Car” by Detective Pikachu. Of course: He’d definitely be savvy enough to know that. On top of being voiced by the same actor as Deadpool (putting a family-friendly spin on the role in the process), the script definitely does a good job at poking fun at the conventions of the genre even if you’re not familiar with noir detective stories. 

"Have fun at your midnight showing of Blade II."

Ms. Norman is an aide to the Cliffords at CNM, leading Tim and Detective Pikachu to Howard’s office. Among the sights here are an array of evolutionary stones, and some statues of Dialga, Palkia and Arceus. Insert “Sinnoh Confirmed” joke/reference here. I must once again compliment how the VFX artists really did a great job with this movie. The way this Eevee touches the Fire Stone and transforms into a Flareon while cloaked in a bright light is right on the mark.

On that note, Bill Nighy’s performance in this movie has a different approach to Howard’s character than Geere’s does for Roger. Even in a movie full of interactive holographs and shapeshifting Ditto (that last one will be important later, by the way), he reads his lines in a surprisingly dramatic and serious fashion; like any professional would. Though this scene does foreshadow his true intentions later on, he is committed to his craft as Howard tells Tim that Harry was trying to solve a mystery for him! Detective Pikachu lampshades this, remarking “that’s a twist, that’s very twisty.”

(Gasps) "Fourth wall break inside a fourth wall break!"

Howard then shows Tim and Detective Pikachu a hologram of the crash footage; which reveals more details that help the case. On top of a brief glimpse of Harry, we get the reason why Detective Pikachu has no memory of what happened: his mind was wiped by Mewtwo (voices of Rina Hoshino and Kotaro Watanabe)! I definitely like this approach: in a similar manner to the game, the mystery slowly unveils more of what happened while also unraveling the larger mystery at hand. Definitely makes more sense than how Alita adapted its story.

After entrusting Tim and Detective Pikachu to find out what happened, the two meet back up with Lucy at the Hi-Hat Café. Since Roger snubbed Lucy’s tip earlier, she decides to give the information to Tim and Detective Pikachu instead. This ends up corroborating the incident at PCL Labs, and all of them decide to go check out the laboratory in the mountains the next day! As many others have been, I am very amused by this whole scene of Detective Pikachu riding in a booster seat in Lucy’s car; as well as the foot massage and spa music to prevent an explosive headache from Psyduck.

"Mm, rich Corinthian leather!"

Breaking into the laboratory, as it’s been condemned; it’s revealed the real reason why Roger dismissed Lucy’s story idea: he was actually one of the financiers responsible for the creation of the R and the capture of Mewtwo! So, the next key to what happened is to find out what Clifford covered up at the lab! Another key figure in the incident is Dr. Ann Laurent (singer/actress Rita Ora in a bit part), who was part of the experiments the night of the accident! 

As they discover some Greninja and Torterra that were part of the experiments, Lucy starts getting some pictures of the lab while Tim and Detective Pikachu scope out the site of the breakout. Outside, what appears to be Roger uses some controls in his briefcase to “tie up some loose ends” while Tim and Detective Pikachu start probing what’s left of the computer at Dr. Laurent’s workstation to find out the exact details of the incident. One brief thing before I continue: I definitely like the little details of Psyduck’s pupils dilating and the Greninja emerging from their stasis pods right as the doors open. The way this scene is filmed and how the sound is cued creates the ideal mood for what comes next.

While some of the files are corrupted, enough of them are intact to confirm the information about Dr. Laurent’s experiments; and reveal another one about a device for a neural link! Why, it’s the new Nintendo Brain Switch! On top of other properties, it allows you to immerse yourself in your favorite games by plugging directly into the base of your spine!

All joking aside, Tim and Detective Pikachu continue searching for more information about the incident two months before Mewtwo’s escape. The latter is able to find Dr. Laurent’s video diaries from the beginning, which explicitly state that it’s the Mewtwo that escaped from Kanto nearly 20 years ago! There are many parallels with the first movie, and this is one of the more notable ones. The creators have even expressed interest in doing a full live-action Mewtwo Strikes Back adaptation, which I’m actually intrigued to see them try.

Now, Tim and Lucy need to get back to Ryme City and let everyone know what’s going on; but first they need to escape from the lab! What follows is another great action scene centered around the Greninja and Torterra; both species that suit this sequence alarmingly well! Not only do the designs look great on film, I actually like how the scene alludes to the monsters doing the more absurd things they’re described as doing in the Pokédex: not just with Greninja’s Water Shuriken being able to shatter glass; but Psyduck’s explosive headaches steal the show. 

The effects of the experiments on the Torterra also start to take hold, making them into massive beasts the size of mountains! … I must say, on top of being a good template for a big-budget Gamera reboot; this does make me want to play Golden Axe again for the umpteenth time.

Everyone starts climbing and jumping around as the landscape starts shifting around them! Detective Pikachu even quips, “At this point: How could you not believe in climate change?!” You and me both, Detective Pikachu: it’s basically the same as not believing in oxygen at this point. They’re able to clear the gap back to the city, but Pikachu is then injured in a rock slide! He’s this close to meeting his maker, but some Bulbasaur are able to lead everyone to the Forest of Healing! As they march in the view of some Comfey and Morelull floating in the background, I can officially say that this movie has had some of the biggest VFX breakthroughs since Jurassic Park. Naturally, this inspired some image macros even before the film came out.

The sound design in this movie is also something I’ve been meaning to compliment: on top of Reynolds’ performance, while some Pokémon say their names like on the TV show; others have arrangements of their cries from the games. I think that’s actually a pretty good compromise. Mewtwo then heals Pikachu’s wounds as well as restores his memory right before Mewtwo is captured by the true villains of the movie! Not only did Pikachu help Mewtwo escape, but the two of them realize they need to split up in order to stop them! 

This final act at the Pokémon Carnival’s parade has the same general idea as the final chapter of the game, but takes a different direction to make it work for the movie’s story: while Pikachu takes the long way back, Tim rides back with Lucy and Psyduck to let everyone know what’s going on! While in the game, there were only a few areas and a clock tower to search for clues; the movie makes use of nearly the whole city. Artistically, it blends the European architecture of the London filming location and a sort of neon-lit “Far East” aesthetic in the vein of Gotham City in Batman Forever; in a good way. 

While Tim goes to warn Howard about what’s going on, Lucy decides to alert the public while slipping into the coat of fellow CNM reporter Cynthia McMaster (an uncredited Abbie Murphy); and Pikachu is singing a somber; yet strangely humorous rendition of the Pokémon Theme.

"Rock, meet bottom."

Making his way back to Ryme City, Pikachu finds the crash site; and what’s left of the Water Shuriken that Greninja launched! This also confirms that the opening car crash wasn’t an accident: it was an assassination attempt! While in the game it just cut to black and hinted at that idea; that’s surprisingly dark. Not quite as dark as the “December 16, 1991” plot thread in Captain America Civil War; but it fits what they’re going for. Also, I kind of like how it’s a subtle nod to Greninja’s initial reveal in Super Smash Bros. 3DS/Wii U. Pikachu realizes what Mewtwo was actually trying to do, and that Tim is in danger! Back in Ryme City, Tim has also learned the sickening truth; and decides to confront Howard. However, Howard anticipated this; and already has the neural link on!

How do you like it? It's the new Nintendo Brain Switch: care to try it when I'm done, Tim?

Dosing Mewtwo with copious amounts of R, Howard transfers his mind into Mewtwo’s body! On top of Mewtwo’s height from the Pokédex of 6’7” being accurate (using Tim as a yardstick), this whole final battle is going to be insane; much like Howard has become. I love it and this movie for that. He is the true villain of the movie, playing all the angles and using his condition as a front for his real plan: to fuse everyone with the bodies of Pokémon! … I’ve never given much thought to it before, but my Pokésona would probably be of my favorite, Lucario. 

Trapping Tim in his office, Howard uses Mewtwo and a bunch of R hidden in the parade balloons to set his plan in motion! For all the weirdness people accept with the Pokémon, they do at least notice when Mewtwo starts causing havoc at the Pokémon Carnival; making all the Pokémon and their partners “merge to one!” 

Pikachu reaches the city just as everything starts going crazy, remarking dryly that “this really blows his bridge discovery out of the water.” Climbing on top of the balloons, he engages his newly-restored powers, shouting: “Game on!”

He then starts bouncing on top of the balloons and off other flying Pokémon, jumping and weaving through Mewtwo’s attacks! This does remind me a lot of the Poké Floats stage in Super Smash Bros. Melee, hopefully it comes back as DLC for Ultimate: still working on the new stage creator feature.

As Pikachu engages Mewtwo, Tim is freed from his bonds and notices some banging inside a nearby cabinet. He opens it to find Roger, the villain of the game and supposed secondary villain of this film bound and gagged! His role and form have been assumed by Ms. Norman, who is actually his Ditto that’s turned on him! While Ditto’s eyes are slightly obvious CGI, the way they stay the same in each form it shapeshifts into is a nice little nod to how its face doesn’t change in some other versions of the series.

While the battle rages, Tim realizes he needs to remove Howard’s neural link to Mewtwo as he and Roger clash with Ditto; who has been enhanced by Howard’s experiments! Pikachu also continues clashing with Mewtwo outside, putting up an impressive fight against this fearsome genetic experiment! Not bad for adapting a battle that was basically a quicktime event sequence in the game. 

Though Pikachu is nearly downed by the recoil from its Volt Tackle, he tells Mewtwo that he wasn’t trying to win: he was just trying to distract Howard! Yes folks, much like how Judge Doom was done in by his own “dip,” Ditto and Howard end up getting bested by their own R: the two are dosed with so much that it destabilizes Ditto and allows Tim to remove Howard’s neural link to Mewtwo!

Tim Goodman wins! FATALITY!

Mewtwo is able to save Pikachu from falling, and as Howard is taken away by the authorities (presumably to the ward or at the very least a “white-collar resort prison”); Roger sheepishly gives Lucy his father’s position, and agrees to undo the damage his father has wrought. Likewise, Mewtwo has been convinced of the value of human life by Pikachu; and to make up for previous slights, Mewtwo declares “I will undo what has been done.” That does make me wonder what they’ve got in mind for the planned sequels and spinoffs, and I will explain more in a moment.

We close on what’s arguably the biggest difference from the game: while the end of that does reveal that Harry is still alive, there aren’t any specifics beyond invoking “and the adventure continues” (looking forward to the sequel on the Nintendo Switch). Here, Harry reunites with his son Tim; and the two are at last together! He’s even played by none other than Ryan Reynolds himself!

"Go be a role model for someone, and tell Beast to stop shitting on my lawn!"

I do like how the movie has the foresight to be self-contained like this. The credits roll to a really good arrangement of the original “Pokémon I Choose You” music, and the art is even drawn by Ken Sugimori in his style! Even the credits are as interesting to watch as the movie itself. As for the songs “Carry On” by Rita Ora and “Electricity”: again, I think they’ll be remembered the same way as the first movie’s OST in another 20 years.

Well, these reviews were definitely interesting experiments; and it's the most fun I've had writing in a long time. This also marks my 500th post on this blog, and though I'm still mostly retired; I might post something when I want, but I better wrap this up.

It took 26 years for them to make a good live-action movie about a beloved anime and video game franchise; and even with my lofty expectations as a longtime fan, “Pokémon Detective Pikachu” is a great first live-action entry for the franchise. Whether or not the proposed sequels and spinoffs (the first of which is currently in development from the writers of “22 Jump Street”) use existing material or write new stories, I welcome the idea.

As I pointed out before, it took years if not decades of sifting through lousy movies based on American superhero comic books till we got ones that were good consistently; and I am definitely open to the idea of adapting the main games and anime along these lines. With a proposed live-action Red and Blue adaptation and Mewtwo Strikes Back remake, hopefully they’ll make it work: my ideal pitch for a film set in the Kanto era would be “Stand By Me” meets “Star Wars: A New Hope,” by way of “Raiders of the Lost Ark” and the Marvel Cinematic Universe. I also wouldn’t mind a similar visual style to this film, and to embrace the insanity of the plot and “colorblind casting” for the human characters. One last thing: drop the “Red and Blue,” just call the standalone adaptation “Pokémon.” One word is much easier to fit the title on a theater marquee; store shelf or digital streaming list. That will be all for now. Later.

Alita: Battle Angel (2019) Review

Hello everyone, it's been a while since I did anything major with this blog; and I am still formally retired from doing recaps. Though, I have been wanting to do these experiments for some time; so this post and the next will be some live-action reviews of recent anime-related movie adaptations. So, as the first, I present my full review of "Alita: Battle Angel." Based on Yukito Kishiro's groundbreaking source material, this movie may not be a total disaster like I was worried about it being; but it's also not the masterpiece many others have held it up as. So, let's open it up.

We open on the year 2563, about 300 years after an event known as "the Fall." Dr. Dyson Ido (Academy Award Winner Christoph Waltz) is searching through some ruins when he discovers the intact head and brain of a discarded android. One side note before I continue: it seems that the 20th Century Fox logo turns into one for "26th Century Fox" at the start; though if they were really trying to predict the future; they could have just put a pair of Mickey Mouse ears on it.

"Three billion human lives ended on August 29, 1997. The survivors of the nuclear fire called the war Judgment Day. They lived only to face a new nightmare: a war against the machines."

Ido then takes the head and brain to his lab, which specializes in cybernetic enhancements. He is able to place them in a new body, who is thereby dubbed "Alita" (Rosa Salazar). I will also get this out out of the way about the eyes: even with the VFX being redesigned, there's just something very off to me about the CGI androids in this movie. The android parts still look all right, but it's the human parts that definitely straddle the uncanny valley for me. This also isn't the only time they've had to redo CGI characters in recent memory either, but here are some screencaps to compare and contrast.

Initial design from teaser trailer.

Final design from finished film.

Alita then gets dressed in an outfit that was left for her, and this leads to a scene where she eats an orange with the peel still on it in view of Ido and his assistant Nurse Gerhad (Idara Victor); before Ido shows how to do it correctly. Neglecting how this scene and Gerhad weren't in the source (in fact, it as basically only Ido and the occasional helper on hand), this essentially has the same effect as the spinach scene in AI. This won't be the only time other movies with a similar premise come up in this review either, especially given the people involved with this one.

Alita then runs outside of Ido's lab, where she is in awe of the setting of Iron City. This practical set, which was built with the combined efforts of New Zealand's WETA Workshop and director Robert Rodriguez at Troublemaker Studios; is actually one of the most visually-interesting things about the movie; even with varying degrees of cybernetic enhancements. One of them is this street performer playing a double guitar with his robotic arms (Iba Thiam), and given what I'm about to tell you; I'd actually be more interested in seeing a movie about him.

Then, at roughly 10 minutes in; when Alita meets a dog by a taco truck (which will apparently still be around in the 26th century), she takes a fighting stance against a walking tank called a "Centurion" (not uncommon, I admit); and she discovers that she apparently has knowledge of a lost martial art known as "Panzer Kunst," literally "Armored Art" in German. No, the film never explains that; not even in a later scene with Ido. Especially strange as Christoph Waltz is German. This also draws the attention of a young man named Hugo (Keean Johnson) and ends up getting caught up in his dealings.

"Your foster parents are kind of dicks, huh?"

Another character she comes across is Dr. Chiren (Jennifer Connelly, lovely as always), who apparently used to be married to Ido; and Alita is using a body meant for their late daughter. (sighs) I will address this further when the time comes, but for now; I shall point out as others have that the kid didn't even exist in the original manga. Ido and Chiren weren't even married at all: they were just colleagues, because heaven forbid a relationship in a dystopian YA sci-fi film be purely professional.

Alita and Chiren meet in Iron City.

As Ido and Chiren talk nearby, their daughter's death was not the only reason why they separated: they both had different ideas about how they wanted to use their knowledge of machines, which was the primary reason from the manga and the 1993 OVA (which adapted the first two volumes that were published at the time) that Ido chose to help the less fortunate in Iron City; and Chiren continued her work in the city of Zalem. One minor change before I address some major ones: while in the manga and the OVA, Chiren crushes her cigarette out on an insect; she just does it with her hand in the movie, since she doesn't smoke here. As an aside, seeing Connelly in this setting just makes me wish I was watching Dark City again instead.

"Good morning Dr. Silverman. How's the knee?" "Fine, Sarah." (Beat) "She, uh, stabbed me in the kneecap with my pen last week."

Chiren then goes back to her new husband, and moreso, her boss; Vector (Academy Award Winner Mahershala Ali). I will address how the movie alters his character as I go on, but I will say for now that the actor at least understands what kind of movie he's in; and his performance is an example of that. He's a much more complex character in the manga, but it's a common course of action when an actor is given a script they deem beneath them.

Vector watching from a distance.

Then, at the 17 minute mark; we get one of the more notable changes from the original: the film places a much greater emphasis on the sport of Motorball (a sort of mixture of roller derby and rugby). While some didn't mind this, I actually feel that it actually did more to hinder the story than help it. The film adapts the first four of the nine volumes of the manga, and it shows with how I'm once again trying to reconcile hundreds of pages of material in a single 123-minute movie. It also doesn't help that it's giving me flashbacks to The Maze Runner; a book and film series that I'm not a fan of at all. It's also an introduction to Hugo's colleague Tanji (Jorge Lendeborg Jr.) and Koyomi (Lana Condor). The latter wouldn't appear in the manga until way later, so this is another example of a movie trying to set up a sequel before the first one is even out. More on that later, since this Motorball scrimmage actually starts out with Alita falling on her back a couple times before she starts getting the hang of it. This will become fairly ridiculous later, especially since the movie tries to play this straight rather than go all in the material. Instead, the movie tries to play things realistically even though we've already gone full Wile E. Coyote at just 17 minutes in.

After that, we get a scene where Alita and Hugo are supposedly falling in love; even though there really isn't a whole lot of chemistry between the two actors at all. Also, once again; heaven forbid we have a relationship in a YA dystopian sci-fi film that's merely platonic. They weren't dating in the manga or the OVA, they were just good friends. This is especially problematic for the denouement; and we'll get to that when the time comes.

The movie also significantly alters many characters' justification for being bounty hunters; or "Hunter-Warriors:" some of this is probably due to how differently Japan and the US view bounty hunters; but most of it is purely creative license. While the source material basically portrays them as peacekeepers doing what they can to survive (since there are no police or guns in Iron City), here; they're much more morally-ambiguous. Not a bad idea, but it's marred by uneven execution. Case in point: while Zapan (Ed Skrein, seemingly playing straight the archetype he was spoofing in Deadpool) isn't that different from the original, Ido's justification is significantly changed; rocket hammer be damned.

On that note, we get the fight in the alley with Romo (Derek Mears) and Nyssiana (Eiza Gonzalez); both androids that are in league with Grewishka (Jackie Earle Haley); which is how the movie is Romanizing the character of Grewcica; I guess. The action scene is all right, but it's actually an example of how I have mixed feelings toward the movie rather than seeing it a step forward for live-action anime/manga adaptations. Don't get me wrong: it's clear that every bit of the $170 million budget is on the screen here; but I never really got into it the same way others did. Even as an admitted fan of the original source, I felt the film focused way too much on the action and not enough on the story and characters. It's an all right film; but the progression of the characters never really felt natural; and the script apparently had drafts ranging from 200 to 600 pages before it was trimmed down, and it shows. These flashback scenes with Alita fighting alongside her mentor Gelda (an uncredited Michelle Rodriguez) actually would make a more interesting movie than the one we actually ended up getting; to be blunt.

Back in Ido's lab, we get the movie's origin of Alita's namesake: the name and her android body originally belonged to Ido's late daughter (Emma Lindsey); who was a paraplegic that was kidnapped and killed by a "jacked" Motorball player named Amok (Casper Van Dien, the movie's words, not mine). Obviously, I'm not really a fan of this kind of subtext; and this whole plot thread didn't exist in the original: the name actually came from Ido's cat. As mentioned before, the girl didn't exist in the original; and Ido never even married. I am not against making changes for an adaptation, but changes of this nature don't make a whole lot of sense to me.

Alita looks over a picture of Ido's late daughter.

Later on, at one of many Motorball scenes in the movie; we see the reigning Champion; Jashugan (an uncredited Jai Courtney, conveying fewer emotions than his role in Terminator Genisys) as Hugo exposits to Alita that the "final Champion" can go to the city of Zalem. To be honest, there's enough material in this plot thread to make a movie of its own; or even a TV series, but trying to wedge it into this movie did not do the pacing any favors at all. It's basically like cramming the appendices of The Lord of the Rings into the entirety of the Prancing Pony scene.

"On your feet, soldier!"

I mean, honestly: right after this, another player ends up being gutted for parts on the street; so said parts can be added to Grewishka as upgrades. Also, while Hugo's involvement is changed with the intent of making it seem more morally-ambiguous; the film ironically gives off the opposite effect of making his character less complex because of the execution. Yet, the dynamic with him and his associate Tanji isn't that different; it ends up making less sense because of how there isn't as much time for their dynamic to develop. That's the major problem I have with this movie: there's so much packed into every scene, there's barely any time for the viewer to breathe and absorb the impact of what's shown before the next one. While the visuals are at least good at a purely surface level, there's not as much of the subtle nuances from the source that helped make it so memorable to me. It's not that I think these characters are bad or the story totally disregards the one from the source (especially compared to other adaptations I've seen and covered here), I just find everything kind of dull. It's easy for me to write about an adaptation that's great or terrible; it's a bit tougher when it's OK. Admittedly, part of me also has mixed feelings about the movie because both Cameron and Rodriguez are filmmakers I find fascinating and are clearly passionate about the project.

Then, at about 40 minutes in or so; we see Alita; Hugo, Tanji and Koyomi go find a crashed warship from "the Fall", and Alita is the only who can reach the control deck; which is underwater. How convenient, as is how she can work the controls to unlock a new "Berserker" android body. As for how she knows how to do this but not who she is: hold that thought until the next review.

"It was smashed, it didn't work, but it taught us things."

Alita brings the body back to Ido's lab, and after a rather strange argument; Alita decides she wants to become a Hunter-Warrior. I do at least give the filmmakers credit of including this robotic head from the source, and the overall commitment of trying to include as much iconography from the manga and OVAs by their own admission. However, in an adaptation; where you made so many changes to the story and characters already, why leave that in? If that's the kind of thing you'd leave in, why not just save the Motorball subplot for later and have her decide to be a Hunter-Warrior earlier in the movie? That's my main issue with the pacing: there's so much going on that there's enough material for several movies; or even a TV series in just this one; so it feels kind of rushed and often underdeveloped.

I digress: after meeting up with Hugo and the dog from earlier, Alita then goes to a local tavern known as "Kansas" for information. You know, one of my associates named Jim Gisriel compared this movie to the first Donner Superman in terms of story structure. However, while that film at least had some semblance of how Clark was discovering his powers and stakes that made sense for the story, this scene of Alita accosting some of the other androids for leads about the people going missing and getting killed just feels kind of awkward to me. I can tell that the people involved with filming this scene understood its appeal from the source; but didn't really understand why or how to make it appeal to others. Even characters like McTeague (Jeff Fahey) or Master Clive Lee (Rick Yune) just feel like glorified set dressings to me. Even with the former's robotic dogs and the latter's 207 confirmed kills, it bears repeating that introducing a character or concept is not the same as establishing them. Sure, they're telegraphing Zapan's weapon; the "Damascus Blade" very hard; but he's really less of the character he was in the manga and more of a cartoon supervillain that Ed Skrein lampooned in Deadpool, as I mentioned before.


Seriously, this whole bit with Alita talking to a pair of barflies about what's happening just feels so strange; and a key reason why I don't think we’re ready for fully-CGI human characters just yet. On top of this, Rosa Salazar's performance comes off less like this generation's Sarah Connor, Ellen Ripley or even Neytiri and more like the B-reel from those Maze Runner movies that I didn't care for at all.

"Can't let you take the man's wheels, son. Now get off before I put you down."

This leads into a bar brawl that I guess is all right, though I admit there is a vast difference in me watching this film Rodriguez made with $170 million and watching his $7,000 directorial debut with El Mariachi. The action in that film had this coarse, unrefined and raw energy to it that made it impressive that it was such an entertaining film on as modest a budget you can imagine. Here, it feels like I misplaced my Playstation controller and I walked in on someone playing a Tekken bonus game.

Ido enters the bar, and Grewishka comes in with his upgrades. Though I admit killing the dog is an easy way to get viewers against the villain (in anything from John Wick to Jojo's Bizarre Adventure); what follows next is just something I could never understand the appeal of: Alita then proceeds to use the dog blood as makeup/warpaint (something that was in close to every promotion I could see), declaring, "I will not stand by in the presence of evil." ... No disrespect intended, but did anyone actually read this out loud before it was filmed, edited and included in the final product? Regrettably, as Grewishka crashes through the floor; that's not the only clunky dialogue either. We're barely halfway through this, folks.

As Alita follows Grewishka into the next action set piece, Grewishka taunts her by saying, "Welcome to the underworld, my world, from here there are worlds upon worlds above worlds; it's where I used to live." On top of being a big case for why we have script doctors, I guess that deadline came from the department of redundancy department. For contrast, THIS is what he said in the manga.

Notice the difference? I personally think that would have fit the setting better; and made the character more threatening. To be fair, the ensuing action scene is competent; and it's clear that even if the story and character hurdles still have a way to go, that this is at least a significant step forward on a purely technical level. The film took two editors (Stephen A. Rivkin and Ian Silverstein) as well as acclaimed cinematographer Bill Pope (whose credits include The Matrix, Scott Pilgrim VS The World and Spider-Man 2) to get this onscreen. Still, the fight does get busy; especially as it's intercut with another flashback involving Alita sparring with Gelda; as well as a brief flash of Nova (Edward Norton, who thankfully doesn't have any awkward; vaguely-YA lines to spout). I will address this later; but to me at least, this would be like if you had a cameo from Thanos halfway through the first Iron Man.

"The future, which had once been so clear to me, had now become like a black highway at night..."

After Alita's body is torn up by Grewishka's "grind cutters," the latter asks if she wants to beg for mercy. She responds by breaking off her arm in Grewishka's eye; ending the fight on the line "Fuck your mercy!" ... Well, there's your PG-13; fellas. Hope all the teenagers that saw this enjoyed that. Personally, I'd be more interested if this was R-rated and closer to the original story.

Anyway, Grewishka slips away licking his wounds to Vector and Chiren; and since Alita's first body has been destroyed, Ido decides to integrate her with the Berserker body. While many people have criticized the innuendo of this sequence, I again submit it's actually less suggestive than the original because of the PG-13; and the body doesn't show her "naughty bits." I personally find it odder that while she doesn't smoke, she has a light anytime she wants one.

Alita in her "Berserker" body.

Elsewhere, while Grewishka is getting more repairs done; he wants to have the scars left alone; as reminders. I mean, Watchmen, the 2010 remake of A Nightmare on Elm Street; now this movie? What is it about Jackie Earle Haley and having his face messed up?

So, Alita ventures off into Iron City and regroups with Hugo; and even as he admires her new body; there's just something off-putting about this casting. If they had developed their relationship more, maybe I'd feel differently. As it stands, there's so little chemistry between them that not even Walter White could find it.

"We're not gonna make it, are we?"

This whole subplot with her artificial heart is also pretty ridiculous, as is its payoff. I dealt with a lot before I stopped doing this on a regular basis; and while it's not the worst deus ex machina I've talked about; the Honest Trailer for this movie put it succinctly when they referred to it as "the Heart of a MacGuffin."

I guess a sample of Unobtanium would have been too subtle.

Now, we get to the much-ballyhooed final Motorball sequence; where Alita takes part in her first qualifying match, taking up the number 99. You know, part of me would have liked to have seen her actually learning to hone her skills and master them. Instead, this absurdity is just tossed at me with a little over 30 minutes left.

Alita preps for her Motorball match.

In the adjoining locker rooms, Vector offers the other competitors 500,000 to "kill the girl called Alita." I once again point out that while Vector wasn't just some Motorball fixer/gangster in the source; that Ali at least understands what kind of movie he signed up for, and makes the most of what he's given. Since he's also going to be in this reboot of Blade, at least I know that the sunglasses and black outfit will be ideal to take up Wesley Snipes' mantle. Just give him the Daywalker blades, and I'm sold.

Right before the match, Hugo gets caught up with Tanji; and on top of being setup with killing an android by Zapan; Zapan then stabs Hugo in the shoulder and cuts Tanji in half. While that sounds brutal, to be honest; the lack of an impact on me as a viewer has less to do with being desensitized and more with how the movie is trying to cram hundreds of pages of story into the last half-hour of a single 123-minute film. It just feels so underdeveloped and underwhelming, especially given how much I like the source material. This extends to the Motorball subplot: the movie doesn't include what I really enjoyed about that story. While it's admittedly an impressive sport, the manga prominently features Alita learning under a coach that couldn't play anymore because of an injury he suffered. He wanted to pass on what he knew before he died (which he did before that thread was resolved), and the story ultimately makes the sport a critique of the futility of competitive violence. The movie naturally features none of this, and what it does feature is something that I've been resisting talking about for a long time.

I will say that as with the majority of the film's sets, the Motorball arena itself is actually pretty great from a technical point of view. The film featured two production designers that worked with Rodriguez before (Steve Joyner and Caylah Eddleblute), so despite what I'm about to say; it's clear that quite a bit of work was invested in making things look good onscreen. On that note, as Vector picks up a drink while Alita takes the stage; it's clear to me that Mahershala Ali was probably the actor most self-aware about the kind of movie he signed up for. He has this way of making a buffet of the scenery that I feel is sorely missing from most of the other cast members. He may not have the same characteristics he did in the manga, but he's the only actor I can honestly say understood what he signed up for completely.

Vector observing the Motorball match.

As Alita joins a gaggle of androids that look like they got lost on their way to the "Flesh Fair" from AI, Ido realizes that they're a group of "Hunter-Warriors" that were sent to put a hit on Alita! He warns her over the phone (somehow), but Alita decides to go through the qualifying round anyway! That's actually the LEAST ridiculous thing about this sequence, as are these androids that aren't doing any favors by reminding me of IGPX. The ball is launched, and the qualifying round begins! I once again remind you all that when she started, Alita could barely work the throttle without falling on her back. Now she's rolling around and smashing the other androids like she's the offspring of the Terminatrix and Brian Boitano! Honestly, it has all the visual cohesion of some kid smashing all the action figures in their toy box together; if the action figures cost $170 million. Again, it would have been nice to see her learning how to do this; but instead it's dumped on your lap with roughly 30 minutes left.

So, rather than being impressed by the spectacle on display; this just goes back to the two major questions I kept asking myself, even right now: when the visuals looked over the top, I asked "Why not make the whole movie animated?" When they looked realistic, I asked "Why not use makeup and practical special effects for Alita and the other androids?" Given how these questions were never answered in any definitive manner, I didn't go to the movie. They bet $10 on me, and they lost. I will say that the music in this sequence is good, as it is with most of the movie. Tom "Junkie XL" Holkenborg (Mad Max Fury Road, Deadpool, and several DCEU films) definitely did a good job with combining orchestral music and modern electronic sounds; and the "Motorball" cue is probably the best example of that.

Alita then gets a call from Hugo about Tanji's death; and I'm honestly surprised how Hugo can outrun Zapan after being stabbed as well as make it to an old cathedral without bleeding out. Alita then crashes through the jumbotron of the stadium and leads the androids on a chase as she tries to get to Hugo before Zapan; with her would-be assailants getting killed one by one. That's basically the cliff notes of that scene: I could barely tell what was going on watching this on my iPad; there's no way I would have been able to make heads or tails of this in theaters.

Alita makes it to the church right before Zapan does, but Zapan is able to mortally wound Hugo as several Centurions surround the building! I know this is supposed to be a dramatic scene, but it's hard for me to get invested when the tone has basically been turned 180 degrees from the source material. It doesn't have to be 1:1 conversion, but when all I can see are a couple actors in mo-cap suits; it makes well-developed characters and a coherent script that much more vital. 

Now, as Chiren realizes what Vector has wrought; we get the payoff of Alita's heart: Alita is able to trick the Centurions into thinking that she's finished off Hugo so she can claim the price on his head. Zapan realizes what's happened, but it's too late; as by "Factory Law," she can defend her catch, which she does so by cutting off Zapan's face with his own Damascus Blade! Not exactly Nicolas Cage or John Travolta; but it works fine. Telegraphed as all get-out, but whatever helps end this is okay with me at this point.

Hugo is also given a makeshift android body to keep him alive; which leads to Alita staging an assault on Vector! This denouement is relatively close to the original 1993 OVA; with some notable differences that I will inevitably address.

"Human Casualties: 0.0"

Alita confronts Vector in his office, crashing through the skylight; and while she's made short work of the Centurions and the robotic head I mentioned before; there's still one last fight with Grewishka to go! As she's hit in the rib with his "grind-cutters", we get one last flashback of her and Gelda during "the Fall", with her mission being to go after Zalem and its leader, Nova! ... That actually would be a more interesting movie than the one I'm talking about; and I will address this in my final thoughts.

So, Alita's wound heals in the most literal example of plot armor I've seen in a while; and she not only cuts off Grewishka's grind-cutters, she cuts him in half a la Kung Lao!

Alita wins! FATALITY!

Alita then accosts Vector, who has really been under the control of Nova all along; and runs him through with the with the Damascus Blade! As he lays dying on the floor of his office, she chastises him that it was a mistake to underestimate her. They are telegraphing this sequel hook so hard, and I will also be addressing this in my final thoughts.

"Men like you invented the Hydrogen bomb, men like you thought it up. You don't know what it's like to really create something, to create a life and feel it growing inside you; all you can create is death and destruction."

So, we get the whole sequence of Hugo trying to climb up to Zalem before he's cut apart by their defenses; and Alita tries to save him and fails. While I do give the filmmakers credit for trying to recreate the scene from a purely surface level at least; it just doesn't have the same impact as it did in the source; let alone any of the previous films that Cameron and Rodriguez have worked on.

"I know now why you cry, but it's something I can never do. Goodbye..."

The film closes on months apparently having passed, Alita continuing to pursue Motorball; even having a new android body for that purpose, and cutting a tear in half. She rolls into the arena, raising the Damascus Blade towards Zalem.

"The unknown future rolls towards us, I face it for the first time with a sense of hope: if a machine, a Terminator can learn the value of human life; maybe we all can too."

We formally close on Nova, who takes off his goggles and smirks at the prospect of meeting Alita. In the off chance nothing comes of this: say Hi to Piccolo, Azula, Sinestro and Ryuk for me, Edward!

So, as both an adaptation and a movie on its own; "Alita: Battle Angel" may not be a complete disaster like I was worried, but it's also not something I would feel like watching over and over again. I was never really onboard the hype train for the movie, and I'm still baffled to why one existed to begin with. I always felt that it looked average, and now that I've finally seen and written about it; I consider it to be average. Now that I've let it sit for a while; I would probably give it a 3 out of 5, 3.5 out of 5 at the most. Not great, but thankfully not terrible either.

If you were to ask me about any potential sequels happening, my reply would be "I don't know." Even the people involved acknowledged the risk of this kind of setup, with Cameron himself specifically citing the Warcraft movie as an example. Sure enough, despite opening at #1; it's now in a similar boat: it made over $400 million worldwide, but less than $100 million in North America, with $85 million domestically and $404 million worldwide on a $170 million budget. It also had quite a bit of competition in the time that followed; and certain groups that will not be mentioned here also attempted to hijack the movie for their own gain. If I'm being totally honest, while neither factor helped matters; this is all highly unlikely to have changed anything.  On the weekend of February 14, the movie ended up leading the lowest-grossing President's day weekend in 15 years.

However, even with this movie more or less failing to "save anime movies;" I think it's okay to keep experimenting even if not every experiment works. I once again point out that even movies about American superhero comic books had to go through years if not decades of terrible adaptations to get to being consistently good (even if there are still misfires like the 2015 Fantastic Four among them). Regardless of whether or not you enjoyed the movie or are anticipating proposed sequels; I strongly recommend you check out the original manga and the 1990s OVAs as soon as you can. 

This was certainly an interesting experiment, and while I am still formally retired from doing recaps; my next live-action review should also prove to be an interesting experience to write about. That will be all for now. Later.