Recap: Gabunyan Hazard

Disclaimer: Those who are unfamiliar with Watchmen will probably not enjoy reading this.

“Rorschach’s journal, October 13th, 1985… Why are so few of us left active, healthy, and without personality disorders? …I shall go tell the indestructible man that someone plans to murder him. … Soon there will be war, millions will burn, millions will perish in sickness and misery…

Because there is good and there is evil, and evil must be punished. Even in the face of Armageddon I shall not compromise in this.”

Hello again. Well, since the first week or so of Yo-Kai Watch turned out to be less than what was expected on Disney XD; it seems that much of Nintendo and Level-5’s promotion and New York Comic-Con is scrambling to raise awareness of the game and merchandise; due out in November and January 2016, respectively. 

Even so, I don’t think a Jinbanyan pin is going to be enough of an enticement to sway potential buyers away from Call of Duty: Black Ops III. Even with some competitors I mentioned being pushed to 2016; the season still has Halo 5: Guardians, Star Wars Battlefront (whose beta went over incredibly well); Guitar Hero Live, Rock Band 4; and their biggest competing franchise in Japan, Pokémon Super Mystery Dungeon.

I’m saying, unless Level-5 can really get people interested in the game among mass audiences; I don’t see Yo-Kai Watch being “the next Pokémon” everyone else is hyping it as. No, convention buzz isn’t sufficient for me; since that’s not really an indicator of how a work will do among general audiences. Pacific Rim is a notable example. While passing $100 million in theaters, it cost double that to make, and didn’t really catch on till it came out on DVD and got aired a lot on FX.

Enough about that; since a large part of my theme is Halloween-related stuff for this month, and I’m giving you one more Yo-Kai Watch recap to illustrate my thoughts on the matter. Let’s open up “Gabunyan Hazard” and talk about it. 

We get an opening from Whisper about Halloween traditions, Yokai, all that good stuff; and then adds in a bit what will happen in New Sakura Town (or rather, Springdale) that Halloween. If you’ve never wondered where Yokai come from, I say it’s time you’ve begun!

Once again, I’m skipping the opening in favor of something I can actually stand listening to.

On a dark night, we hear the screams of the eponymous Gabunyan over the night sky.

What a terrible night to have a curse!

We cut to our “heroes” (I use the term with as much weight as Rocky Horror does); Keita, Fumiko, Kanchi, and Kuma marveling at the sights before them that Halloween. Also, as it usually happens when some family-friendly works do a Halloween special with supernatural elements, the Yokai can walk around in plain sight; even without the aid of the Yo-Kai Watch. This actually presents an interesting idea: if the Yokai are such a blight on the townsfolk; why not have them be seen by more people than just Keita? Why pigeonhole yourself by having your protagonist be little more than a vehicle to sell overpriced knick-knacks that nobody needs? 

More on that later, because Keita is apparently meeting his friends for a gathering in town; and doesn’t have a costume ready. … Honestly? I usually tend to have my costume ready a year in advance, if not longer! I’ve been wanting to be a Jedi this year ever since I saw the leaked trailer to The Force Awakens in 2014!

After snubbing a cowboy and Dracula; Jibanyan suggests a sheriff from “a popular Dracula drama.” Okay, first of all, The Walking Dead definitely isn’t a show that kids should be aware of; let alone cosplaying from. Second of all; if it’s a reference meant for my age range, save it. I don’t really care for the show; and I still express incredulity at the fact that it’s lasted six seasons and a spinoff (though I would be willing to play the Telltale game and agree the comics have merit to them).

Before he heads to the train station; Keita decides to take a nap; with Whisper now sharing my sentiment that he has no motivation. Our hero, ladies and gentlemen!

After hastily throwing on his costume; he discovers that his mother has started to become a Gabunyan. Yes, you read that right. 

Mike Nelson: Oh look! It's not often you see the stupidest thing you've ever seen!

Yet, Keita is so fucking dense he actually has to question whether or not Mrs. Amano is a vampire! 

It's called EVIL, kid.

It even gets to the point where Jinbanyan has to force him out of the way while he escapes! He even asks what’s going on? That’s a question I ask every time I watch this anime. Even so, despite evidence to the contrary; he’s initially convinced it’s just a costume until he sees it in action! My word, man! Even Fred Jones would find your skepticism to be too heavy-handed! 

Jinbanyan even likens the drama to a documentary. Yeah, and Fox News is non-partisan! Keita’s friends find him; and Keita is ultimately forced to tell his friends about the Yokai threat facing them.

Here is where I decided to write about this episode and how this Halloween episode is easily a microcosm of all my problems with Yo-Kai Watch. I mean, here’s your chance to really show what you can do with all your spooky creatures and monsters; not just use them for bizarre jokes, you could show how they might actually frighten someone? Crazy idea, isn’t it?

Yet, that’s why I never really “got” Yo-Kai Watch, and still don’t as it’s coming stateside. What’s the point of having all these great Yokai on hand if you’re not going to do anything more elaborate than make them glorified dime-store baubles?

Furthermore, it turns out that his friends actually believe him! While it’s one thing to have the Yokai be to blame for Keith accusing Fumiko of being fat (or rather, “Not pretty” in the dub), why limit yourself to having us put ourselves in the shoes of one idiot who makes the likes of Goku, Luffy and Natsu read like a MENSA membership list? My point is; by putting the focus solely on Keita, potential like this is truly lost for showing how the characters work rather than merely telling it. 

So, with the town slowly morphing into Gabunyan; it falls to Keita, Kanchi, Kuma and Fumiko to make a cure and feed it to the head Gabunyan. I’m honestly going to get real sick of typing this before the night is over. 

It also presents how the putting the emphasis on comedy subsequently harms the potential of the concept. With the darker precedent set by Level-5’s own Ni No Kuni, the anime’s fluff approach not only made it harder for me to potentially accept the Yo-Kai Watch video game; but as a kid’s series, the lack of any real danger or nightmare fuel is essentially poison in my veins to me.

It is entirely possible to make a work that’s both dark and family friendly. My favorite works in the genre include moments that stick with me more because of how horrific they can be. Large Marge in Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure, Gozer in Ghostbusters; Jim Henson’s puppetry in Labyrinth and The Dark Crystal are all key examples I can cite.

The same principles apply with anime as well, especially when targeting young audiences. While I am well aware of the concept of defanged horrors; Yo-Kai Watch goes a step further and effectively has them spayed and neutered a la Bob Barker. Even when their town is overrun by vampiric Yokai; it feels more like reruns of Care Bears than the gothic horrors of Seraph of the End. Yet, I do admire the fact they’re trying here; but as I’m about to tell you, things start to fall apart in the second act like a mess of banged-up Ultron drones. 

IS THAT THE BEST YOU CAN DO?!

They try to lure out the real one with an autographed poster of NyaKB (you see what I mean, Viz? This gag isn’t going to make sense if you continue to use it in the context of just calling them a generic “girl group.” Makes about as much sense as simply calling Led Zeppelin a “rock band.”). What could possibly go wrong?

Surprise surprise! They’re all knucking futs about this girl group! Clearly they underestimated the power of the estrogen brigade. It’s the key reason why Pitch Perfect 2 beat Mad Max Fury Road at the box office (guess the aca-Bellas wanted it more than the road warriors). 

Everyone reaches the school; and the G-virus is airborne (so named because I’ve been really busy with Spanish and I’m sick of typing Gabunyan despite being halfway through this piece of shit).

Just as Kuma succumbs to the G-virus; it’s at this point where I realized Yo-Kai Watch was beyond saving for me. I kept watching to make sure I simply wasn’t “getting it,” but this is the 42nd episode. At least 80 and a movie have been subbed. I’m not going to find anything I’ll like besides the high-quality animation now. If I’m going down for this, I’m taking this fucker with me. 

It seems the cure is made of moldy bread, onions and salt. Well, at least it’s easy to find. I don’t know how the merchandise will do here; least of all if it will generate the scarcities on the same level of Cabbage Patch Kids in the ‘80s or Power Rangers in the ‘90s. 

Yet, even Fumiko and Kanchi succumb to the G-Virus; once again leaving the day to be saved solely on Keita’s shoulders.

This goes back to my initial piece on the franchise to this point; as well as to my earlier point about this episode. While this special had some of the potential to be the point where Yo-Kai Watch could truly show off its potential; it instead fell to the same pratfalls the bulk of the series before and since has. Only six minutes left. Let’s go kick some ass.

Keita, Jibanyan and Whisper reach the stage, and all the Gabunyan are waiting for them.

Play the best song in the world or we'll eat your souls!

They spray the vaccine all over the crowds of Gabunyan; hoping for the best. I honestly don’t care what happens to these guys right now. Just as well, because the vaccine doesn’t cure them; but instead turns everyone in town into Jinmenken. There’s only 4 minutes left; and the ending is less than satisfying, I promise you that. 

You mix a Hell of a Caucasian, Jackie.

Of course, the TV happens to be on and it’s a coincidental broadcast. Perfect for exposition ever since “Robotic Fish Gone Wild!”

Media Break! You give us three minutes, we give you the world!

Naturally, they all start conversing like drunken businessmen. I guess there must have been vodka in the “toilet water,” eh Viz? The night leads them to a bar; which makes things uneasy for future prospects of this anime.

Of course, Keita is royally devastated at how he fucked everything up once again. You’ll have to forgive my language; I’m just venting about the events of this month so far, and this piece of trash isn’t helping. 

Then, all the Jinmenken show up at Keita’s doorstep as if it were time for The Purge. Guess Michael Bay wasn’t satisfied with just making Transformers 5 and decided to keep bankrolling low-budget classist fantasies. You know, like Ouran! Of course, the whole thing was just a dream; the standard way to render everything pointless by retconning the events of the episode. Allow Tom Servo to breakdown for me. 

Thus is what’s overall my biggest complaint with Yo-Kai Watch: in obvious fact, they wasted a perfectly good plot. Not just with this episode; the whole show is a massive letdown for what everyone else was ostensibly hyping as “the next Pokémon.” Instead, the newest dub episode seems to have been bumped in favor of a Gravity Falls marathon and the game now officially faces an uphill battle against Black Ops III; short of a last-minute date change.

As for any comparisons to Spirited Away: I not only reject them because of that being my favorite Miyazaki film; but also because the two are worlds apart in writing and characterization. The whole point of that film was to show how Chihiro could be wonderfully transformed from a whiny little girl into a fine young woman through the hero’s journey; learning humility and the value of hard work under the persona of Sen. Keita, however; hasn’t learned anything about the world around him at all; let alone how to deal with the Yokai afflicting his and everyone else’s life.  Thus, “Gabunyan Hazard” became the point where I gave up on it. It’s the anime equivalent of having too much chocolate: it tastes good at first, but your mind will be reeling and your insides will be ripped apart by the time it’s over.

With this, I officially say it’s time for me to detox. I personally don’t plan on doing any more Yo-Kai Watch until after the game or toys launch; so I can see if the anime has ruined anyone else’s potential enjoyment of those sections besides mine. The manga is decent, but you honestly can’t count me among those who can outright say they like it. Check back with me next week to see what I have in store. Bang.